As a nerdy kid (who we established earlier grew into a nerdy MANLY man) like most kids I wanted super powers. After growing up it kinda ticks me off that I now realize that I could have had them by just watching Sesame Street.
When you first have a kid, you realize the magical powers of “The Street” (that’s the cool name I have for the show. It makes non parents think that I know about a cool new show that they don’t know about when I say “hey going home to watch “The Street.”) Everyone knows that it helps with counting and stuff like that…but if you watch your kids even closer, you will see that The Street is some kind of special government testing program that is mutating are children…here are some of the powers.
SUPER VISION
A couple of weeks ago we were at the store, all of a sudden one of the boys got a huge smile and screamed “ELMO!!!!” I looked around the isle to see what he was looking at and thought he was just hallucinating or going through “Street Withdrawals” (which is not one of the powers, it just is the constant craving for the drug known as “The Street.”) All of a sudden, my wife noticed that on the other end of the next isle, there was a little gift bag with a picture of Elmo on it. I had to take a few steps towards it and really look to see it.
SUPER HEARING
Along with vision comes hearing. Most children when they get over a year old, thinks it’s the funniest thing in the world to do the opposite of what you want them to do. Usually this really takes shape if you need to change their diaper. When I say “Come here, let me change your diaper” he usually takes off straight down the hallway laughing. No matter what you say he will not come back…however…even with the door almost closed, and the TV volume really low…If you put on the Sesame Street theme song, or Elmo’s world theme song…he will open the door, and run as fast as he could to the living room.
SUPER PAIN TOLERANCE
Once he gets to the living room, the question is how do you get him to stop fidgeting…put on the street. As long as they are watching, you can do anything to them…In fact that is how I cut one of their hair the last time I tried. Along with that, if they are crying…put it on, and the tears stop.
SUPER VOCAB
And last but not least…with all the good comes the bad. We all know that you can learn stuff from the street, but sometimes… you don’t want them too. There is a episode called “Mine-itis” about teaching kids to share. Having twins, this is a very important subject…however…for little kids that only know a few words, all they see is their favorite characters, grabbing stuff, and screaming “MINE!!!” so after almost 2 years of successfully NOT teaching them that word, all they can say now is “MINE, MINE, MINE.” Grrrrrrrrr.
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